(Click on the card above and a new page will open with the card for printing)
Please print out the above
"Membership Card 2010"
for use at Bear Events in NYC!
Fill in your name at the bottom.
FREQUENTLY ASKED
QUESTIONS
IS THERE A FEE AND WHAT SHOULD I BRING?
New York Bear Den is NOT a fundraising organization. It was founded for, and intends to remain a purely social organization. At our monthly gatherings, we collect a $5 donation at the door to help pay the rental for the room, and each attendee is expected to bring a snack or non-alcoholic beverage such as juice, soda, tea, or bottled water for everyone to enjoy throughout the afternoon. It can be anything from a bag of chips, with or without dip or salsa, to fried chicken, to pizza, to fresh vegies or fruit, with or without dips, to roasted chicken, to bread & meat for sandwiches, to pretzels, to snack cakes, to donuts, to coffee cakes, or pretzels, or baklava, or eclairs, to....... well, you get the picture! All of this, and more have been enjoyed at past gatherings! We also have a door prize drawing (everyone gets a ticket when they check in) at each meeting for DVD's, books, and various items, which winners can choose from!
WHERE DOES THE MONEY GO AND WHO'S RUNNING THIS?
An accounting of our funds is published following each meeting and our financial records are available at every meeting for transparency of where the money goes and how much we have on hand. There are no officers, treasurers, board, etc. Decisions, when necessary, are made by a Steering Committee which is open to anyone.The founders of the NY Bear Den, Carlin L. & Chaz A. oversee the month to month operations of the group, as well as promotions & website maintenance. Click HERE to review notes from Steering Committee Meeting for 2010!
WHO GOES TO THE NEW YORK BEAR
DEN AND WHERE ARE THEY HELD?
Gay,
Bisexual and Transgendered Men attend our events, including singles and couples from all over (but
especially the tri-state area) who enjoy good conversation and making new
friends. Members and regulars see the Bear Den either as a supplement or
alternative to the bars and clubs. The Bear Den reaches out to all
men, 18 and older, but we especially focus upon Bears, Cubs, Chubs (Big Men) and
their admirers. Our events are held at QUEENS PRIDE HOUSE, 76-11 37th Avenue (Upstairs to the left). CLICK HERE FOR MAP We regret that our events are NOT handicapped accessible due to stairs.
WHAT HAPPENS AT A NEW YORK BEAR DEN MONTHLY
EVENT?
The Bear Den creates a welcoming atmosphere for all
folks who walk through our door. A greeter makes you a name tag and
introduces you to a few guys. Because we’re not a bar and don’t allow
alcoholic beverages, the atmosphere tends to be friendlier and more
conducive to meeting and talking.
The Bear Den strives to find creative new ways to get men
talking. There are easy-to-learn games being played, allowing for small
talk and laughter. There are other
board games, card games (like poker, Crazy 8's and UNO ) and challenge games like scrabble and trivia games. We feature free WiFi internet access, so you can bring your laptop (or other
wireless internet device) and share your favourite websites or YouTube
clips (or X-Tube, who
knows?) !
We're a new organization, founded in February 2009 because of a major gap in non-bar,
Bear social events in the New York City area. In the future
we plan to co-sponsor some
gatherings with other select groups as well as possibly develop some limited art/culture/music-based events
and some seasonal or themed gatherings. We are a totally volunteer organization so we
will only be as successful as guys like YOU help us to
be!
We also nosh on the food and beverages that we all bring
(we have some excellent cooks among us!). If you wish, our photographer
will pull you aside and take your picture (perhaps with a new buddy you’ve met
here!)
Oh, yes… some of us cruise the crowd, find date/s and…
well, you get the picture.
WILL I REALLY MEET OR TALK TO SOMEONE AT THE NEW YORK BEAR
DEN?
Oh yes, you will! This is especially true if
you volunteer. Volunteers are in the best position to meet and chat up
attendees and first-timers. Try these 'tried-and-true' lines out, the next time
you volunteer for: setup ("Hey, your muscles really flex setting up that
table!"), greeting ("Welcome to the Bear Den... Wow, that’s a really sexy
tattoo! Do you have more?"), hospitality
("Here, let me cut you a piece, Sir. It’s really a pleasure to serve
you."), or breakdown ("... I’d really love to hear more about you wrestling
bears in the Canadian Rockies, since we're
almost done, how about going to dinner?").
Whether you're shy (or not) we need volunteers to make
our monthly events a success. We only ask for two hours of your
time. When you are scheduled to volunteer for a full shift, we waive your door charge!* Not only
can you socialize whilst performing your volunteer duties, you're
encouraged to!
* You are still required to bring a large non-alcoholic
beverage or snack to share. Some restrictions may apply. Enquire for
details.
I WENT TO A NEW YORK BEAR DEN EVENT AND NOBODY
TALKED TO ME. :-(
That can happen on occasion and we
apologize. Here are some possible reasons why:
No one knew you. It takes motivation to go introduce
yourself to a stranger. It’s hard for you and for everyone else.
It's much easier to converse with familiar faces than with unfamiliar ones.
People were busy catching up with friends and having
fun. Some of the people in the group have known each other for years, so their
familiarity might be a little intimidating for you.
No one knew you wanted to talk to anyone or were unaware
that you were too shy to say “Hello”.
You may have appeared ‘unapproachable.’ Sometimes even a
very handsome man can spend the afternoon sitting at a table by himself
because others got the feeling that he wanted to be left alone, when the truth
is, he was dying to talk to anyone. The solution is simple: Don’t go sitting
at a table by yourself – join a table with two to three others at least.
Because the New York Bear Den is not a dark
bar with loud music, that change in environment alone can again be a bit
intimidating (and wonderfully refreshing at the same time). If you are used to
socializing with an alcoholic beverage in hand to ‘loosen you up’, being at a
dry event can put you and others possibly a bit ‘on edge’ the first time you
are at one of our events, or at the beginning of each event. That can
sometimes make our body language or facial expressions to others say things we
don’t really feel.
Our small group of volunteers may have
been engaged in managing the event and didn't have the opportunity to
talk to you (that time, at least).
Here are some pointers for you:
Contact the Bear Den steering committee before
coming to the Bear Den and let us know you are coming for the first or second
time, and then we’ll be able to introduce you to others.
Be prepared for a social situation. In other words,
conversation is a two way street. If you don't have anything to say, chances
are people will walk away from you after a minute or so.
All New York Bear Den attendees wear name tags. Don't be
shy to address someone you don't know by their name.
Other guys have the same difficulty getting to know folks. The more familiar your
face is at our events, the easier it gets.
Remember: Volunteer for the
Bear Den and you will most
assuredly get to know and talk to many other folks!
Here's some possible "ice
breakers" you may find helpful, besides the ones suggested for VOLUNTEERS
above:
I see you have a piercing, Do you have anything else
pierced? :-)
Boxers or Briefs? Can I
find out later?
We hope this is helpful. We would hate to have you
miss out on a lot of good times because of first impressions.
